Seriously, this is the kind of week that leaves one weary with disappointment. Go see Paddington 2. It’ll make you feel hope again.
Den of Thieves: Christian Gudegast makes his directorial debut with a shameless riff on Michael Mann’s still-untouchable Heat, and as much as I like Gerard Butler and Pablo Schreiber, Al and Bobby they are decidedly not. (Also, Heat was never boring.)
The Final Year: Okay, this isn’t bad or anything. But it’s a documentary about the last year of Obama’s foreign-policy team that tries to use Trump’s election as a third-act twist, which is just plain bizarre given that Obama’s former secretary of state was the woman running against him.
Forever My Girl: Jessica Rothe — such an unexpected delight in Happy Death Day — stars opposite Alex Roe in a tale of abandonment and reconciliation that was somehow not written by Nicholas Sparks. Poor Rad. Poor, poor Rad.
Hostiles: Scott Cooper’s big, heavy Western has a fantastic cast and gorgeous locations, and doesn’t do anything with either. But if you want to see what actors do when they’re not given any direction at all, do check it out.
In the Fade: Yeah, the only good movies opening this week are TIFF titles. And thought Fatih Akin’s latest has been getting mixed reviews, Susan is staunchly on the thumbs-up side, arguing that Diane Kruger’s performance powers through any of the script’s issues.
The Road Movie: Dmitrii Kalashnikov’s dashcam tour of a chaotic Russia made a buzzy debut at last year’s Hot Docs, but Kevin doesn’t think there’s all that much to it.
12 Strong: What’s that? Den of Thieves doesn’t satisfy your craving for beefy, bearded actors lugging around heavy weapons? Well, Mr. Jerry Bruckheimer has a movie for you, and it comes coated in a sheen of post-9/11 jingoism! Whee!
… yeah, go see Paddington 2. Or see it again. Whatever works.