There are only a few distributors foolhardy enough to go up against a Harry Potter movie, so the release slate is relatively light this week. And that’s nice, actually, because the next few weeks are going to be insane.

“The End of the Line”: You like sushi, do you? Me too; that’s kind of the problem. Rupert Murray’s sobering documentary explores the global impact of overfishing, and comes to the disturbing conclusion that, sometime in the next forty years or so, fish will be … over. Glenn and Adam elaborate.

“(500) Days of Summer“: Hey, remember when Zooey Deschanel was a breath of fresh, idiosyncratic air rather than a blank-eyed zombie who insisted on singing once per feature? I can’t really blame her for taking the path of least resistance, but so is everybody else in this focus-grouped quirkfest, designed to please people who want their indie edge to look and sound as much like “How I Met Your Mother” as possible. (Which is actually edgier than this. It had a goat last season.)

“Seraphine“: Yolande Moreau delivers an excellent performance in Martin Provost’s utterly unsentimental variation on the tortured-artist biopic; if it looks familiar, that’s because you’ve been seeing it on the DVD shelves for a month and a half now. Here’s hoping this is a trend; I can think of half a dozen other movies E1 has sent straight to disc that deserve a shot at the big screen.

“The Stoning of Soraya M.”: Cyrus Nowrasteh turns Freidoune Sahebjam’s tale of a judicially sanctioned honor killing in 1986 Iran into a hand-wringing indictment of evil Muslim patriarchy. Susan feels its bludgeoning approach is excessive, but justified; Adam begs to disagree.

And now, I’m off to see my first Cannes film of 2009 … in a Toronto screening room. Stupid lousy economic downturn.

So they’re doing midnight shows of “Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince” tonight. My NOW review should be up very soon — it’s running in Thursday’s paper, which starts hitting the stands late Wednesday evening, but we were going to try to get it online a little sooner to stay on top of the release. UPDATE: Here it is!

Still, if you absolutely need to know what I thought of the movie RIGHT THIS SECOND, you have a couple of options. I’ll be part of a Pottermania story airing tonight (Tuesday) at 11 pm on City TV, and tomorrow morning I’ll be appearing live on CTV Newsnet at around 9:15 EDT.* It’s Potteriffic! Or … Pottertastic! Or something. Anyway, if clips become available, I’ll post links. ANOTHER UPDATE: Here’s the Newsnet interview. Not sure if City ever put their piece online.

And speaking of Pottermania, here’s my latest Sympatico/MSN movie gallery, looking at eight actors who’ve tried to transcend their signature characters or personae. Daniel Radcliffe is indeed one of them, because we’re all a little worried about that business with the horses.

* In the Toronto area, City TV can be found on UHF channel 57 and cable channel 07; CTV Newsnet is channel 62 on Rogers digital cable. You’re welcome.

Short post this morning; stuff needs doing before the TIFF ’09 opening press conference this morning. (Yes, it’s back, and may God help us all.)

So I’ll just point you at a couple of new Sympatico/MSN galleries cooked up in advance of the Katherine Heigl-Gerard Butler comedy “The Ugly Truth” — ye requisite Battle of the Sexes rundown, and ye reliable list of Manly Movie Men. Do enjoy!

So “Bruno” made $30.4 million over the weekend, ensuring that Sacha Baron Cohen will return to punk Americans once again — though you have to wonder what he does for this encore.

Maybe something where he investigates the West’s long-buried heightist tendencies by disappearing into the role of a five-foot-six person? That presents a suitable challenge.

Another Friday, another flood of new arrivals on the big screen … and one of the summer’s best movies threatens to be clobbered by one of its worst.

“Bruno“: Look, I loved “Borat” as much as the next guy. (Maybe even more so, actually, once I realized I was sort of understanding the Hebrew dialogue Baron Cohen was substituting for Kazakh.) And I understand the value of revealing the noxious homophobia of rural America. But this series of increasingly immature provocations doesn’t produce anything of comic or satirical value — though there will be plenty of people who think it does.

“Il Divo“: Paolo Sorrentino’s head-spinning biopic of Italian political player Guilio Andreotti took the Jury Prize at Cannes last year, presumably because they figured they had to give Sorrentino something for all the effort. I would have been extra-perverse and given the Best Actor prize to Toni Servillo instead — his gnome-like stillness is the only thing that breaks through the movie’s bludgeoning style.

“The Hurt Locker“: Kathryn Bigelow’s exceptional movie about an American bomb-disposal squad trying to survive Iraq is being buried by all the “Bruno” hype. Don’t let it slip past you; it’s her best film since “Near Dark”, and it’s definitely worth seeing on a big screen. Also, if this doesn’t land Jeremy Renner five major features by the time September rolls around, he needs a new agent.

“I Love You, Beth Cooper“: Have you ever seen a filmmaker completely misjudge the tone and intention of his source material? No? Well, don’t start with Chris Columbus’ boneheaded attempt to turn Larry Doyle’s brilliant deconstruction of John Hughes movie logic back into a crowd-pleasing John Hughes movie. I’m not sure anyone could have made this work on-screen, but Columbus just fails so profoundly …

“Valentino: The Last Emperor”: Circumstances prevented me from seeing Matt Tyrnauer’s ride-along with revered fashion designer Valentino Garavani … and it looks like I dodged a bullet, based on Rad and Adam‘s reactions. Lucky me!

So last night’s Retro Reels screening was kind of surreal; I’ve known Erica Ehm for years — our dogs used to hang out together — and it was amazing to see a crowd responding to her in a specifically 1980s  context. It was also amazing to see the diversity of that crowd, which ranged from Twitter-savvy teens to people in their fifties, answering the musical question “Who comes to see a free screening of a fairly forgettable John Hughes production?”

After we did our little introduction thing, Harbourfront’s nice social-media person sat us down for a video podcast that’s supposed to go up later today. I’ll post the link when it’s available, but I must caution you: It’s in HD, and I was already a little moist from the humidity. I may look like a ghoul.

Speaking of Harbourfront stuff, I take a look at another of their free film series in today’s NOW — specifically, the film component of Beats, Breaks & Culture, which will be screening “Urgh! A Music War” and “24 Hour Party People” on Saturday and Sunday, respectively, at the Studio Theatre. Here’s the piece.

Also worth a look, internet-wise: The Onion AV Club’s latest inventory, gathering 17 films and television shows which take the mickey out of critics. Because we have too much mickey, I guess.